Image: LilywhytePhotography

Marriage is big deal, and choosing who to tie the knots with is one of the most important decisions anyone will ever make. Marriage unveils reality; it opens one’s eyes to a whole new different world; and because of its grave importance, there are no rooms for errors.

Ideally, love should be the main motivation behind every union but—as reality has shown—even love is not always enough: When choosing a life partner, a person must consider other things as integrity, morals, and piety, so that what looks like sound judgment won’t end up as a giant disaster.

Whatever reasons are considered before a wedding is fixed, these are 5 reasons no one should ever consider.

Money

Money is good. And personally—even though most men might not care—I don’t hope to marry a poor woman. But here’s the thing – when the time is right, I will never base my decision solely and entirely on how much my partner has. Indeed, no man—or woman, especially woman—ever should. It’s a big mistake. Money is never the basis of a solid relationship. Put in other words, getting married for money is selfish, disastrous, and unwise, and it leads to heartache, suspicion, and disaster.

If you marry for money, you’ll pay for it (although things seem to be working just fine for the current Mrs Trump. LOL).

You’re Getting Old

When most ladies get to a certain age-grade (usually, when they are on the wrong side of 30), they literally close their eyes and pick the next available suitors - these ladies usually don’t care about chemistry, romance, or money; they are just afraid of spending the rest of their lives alone.

Yes, I know that attending wedding ceremonies and waiting in line to catch the bouquet can be depressing; that the loud ticking of a biological clock can be frustrating; and that getting invitation cards from your exes can be excruciatingly painful but marriage is an ‘until-death-do-us-part’ deal that must be approached with care and caution. Rushing into a marriage because you’re getting old is a wrong decision that may hurt you badly in the end.

Your Parents Are On Your Neck
Only last week, my mom called to ‘check up on me’ but I knew that was a lie, because the whole point of our conversation was about ‘finding someone and settling down’. My grandma does the same thing. Yeah, I know that they have good intentions, but getting married primarily to make someone else happy just seem like a really bad idea! I would never budge.

If you’re currently in this position, determine to make your stand; remember that it is your life and if you rush into marriage because of anyone, they are not going to be there when you’re going through arid and torturous times.

Your Friends Are All married

There are a lot of articles and quotes out there about not racing on someone else’s time, but it’s not exactly nice to be the maid of honour/best man at your friends’ wedding while you remain single. Still, you can’t make major life decisions based on your friend’s statuses. Don’t get caught in the domino effect. Do what works for you. The truth is, you’re better off alone than with someone who makes your life miserable.

You do not want to fornicate

Here’s a confession – when I think about the first thing that might push me into marriage, its sex! Hey, don’t judge me: Paul says that it is better to marry than to burn with lust. I don’t want to engage in premarital sex, and marriage seems like a righteous, acceptable way to fulfill all my sexual desires, but as I have learnt, getting married mostly because of sex is wrong too.

Why?

Well, because if one cannot learn to control himself/herself outside marriage, he/she isn’t probably going to do any better in marriage; and lack of self-control in marriage can lead to all sorts of problems.

You Think Marriage Will Change Your Partner

I know it sounds a little odd, but I have seen people who got married solely because they felt that marriage will make their partner more devoted, less self-centered, and behave more like an adult. It’s probably true that marriage infuses a level of maturity and responsibility into people but since there are no guarantees that marriage will fix your partner, you shouldn’t take a huge, senseless gamble. Before you make the biggest commitment of your life, have a serious conversation with your partner about the behaviours that you consider wrong and immature, and if you’re okay with the outcome of the discussion, then go ahead with it; if you’re not, then you’ve not found the ‘one’, even if you deeply love him/her.